February 18, 2019
We had the most amazing wedding surrounded by our best people. We shared laughs, tears, and our ceremony was soulful and spiritual. But as a woman and a wedding photographer it is hard to not look back and wish for a few things to adjust or change. Today I am sharing 5 regrets from our Wedding. This is part of the Personal Wedding Series. First I talked about 5 things I have learned being married, then 5 Take aways from our wedding. Today here a few things I would change and next I will be sharing 5 things I would ABSOLUTELY NOT change.
A trend that started after our day was doing first looks with the men who loved you first. In hindsight, I wish I would have done a first look with my Dad and my brothers. They have shaped much of who I am as a woman and I wish I had those moments with them too. Intimate moments that captured our relationship. Not just the posed moments during family formals. I am especially close to my older brother, Clay and I wish I had moments with him. He was emotional that day and avoided me as I believe he would have just fallen a part. But looking back, if I had prioritized that time with him I would have moments to look back on that show the testament of our relationship in an authentic way and not just a posed way. And my dad means the world to me. My big teddy bear. If I would have had that frozen, man that would have been gold as I cherish our bond so much.
Looking back, while my girl’s dress were complimented more on than my own, I would have changed them so they would be long and help them stay warmer. They would have been more elegant and would have paired better with the season we got married in.
O man, I am sure you have read the groomsmen story. But in case you haven’t, here is a little summary… We left them in the room where the guys got ready during our first look. That left them plenty of time to prank us. Plenty of time to trash our suite, drink all the alcohol, and turn the heat up (literally). And they had time to neatly stack the bed supports so when my new husband gently pushed me onto the bed, I would then broke the bed. YIKES!! So I would have had them go somewhere else in hindsight so our wedding night would have gone a little more than I planned. We planned on changing and meeting our friends after as they were staying a house not far from where we were staying. I was little annoyed so we decided to not go over there.
You know those people who shape your life and have walked so much of it with you. Those that have made a huge impact on your story. Make sure you remember to freeze that moment with them. There are certain people, who I didn’t make a priority to get a picture with and I wish I could go back and change.
We wanted a desert bar and not so much of a cake table. It was a beautiful display of mini desserts, macaroons, whoopee pies, and cupcakes. But the placement of it was a bad choice on my part. It was right by the door. The restaurant was open on the 2nd floor and while restaurant goers exited their dinner, they would sneak a dessert. Leaving our guests and us with little selection. I wanted a desert bar for the MACAROONS and I only got ONE!!!!! So note to self, move the desert bar away from the door and if you happen to go to a restaurant while a wedding is happening, don’t be that person and take things that aren’t meant for you… it is just rude!
We made a point to write our own vows because we love when ceremonies are personal. When you can feel the love. When ceremonies have soul. We wrote our own vows because they mattered to us. Although, I wish I would have put a bit more time into mine. But looking back, I wish we would have written private letters to each other. Letters that only we would read. Letters on how we were feeling that day. Letters that really froze those feelings into words.
I also would not have chosen the suits we did. Back then there were little options for tan suits. In hindsight we should have gone with a navy suit that actually fit. My husband was swimming in his suit and the pants were not tailored but more like parachute pants. I wish we would have gone with more of a custom look that actually fit them well.
There you have it. My 5… well 6 regrets from our wedding day. Hopefully some of these resonated with you and you learn from our regrets. But all in all, you look towards your wedding day with a new perspective that the little details don’t matter as much as the people there with you do. Make a point to get those photos with your key people. There is a fine balance in getting the images you want and enjoying your day.
Stay tuned for next week as I share 5 things we ABSOLUTELY would NOT change.